Preparing

WE ordered a mini crib so we can have Julia in our room, it arrived yesterday. Mattress and bedding coming from a different person,it is on its way, and I just went and bought 2 necklace passport/money holders for us in prep for the trip. Rumors have it they are matching files this week, so hopefully within 2 we will have it in hand...time will tell!!!

Waiting

not even the smell of a rumor this week, so we wait for next week, my hope is something will start to come to light then with referrals early in November before we have to take off...so we wait...I am amazingly calm...not sure why LOL!!!

Mid October, here we are!

well, what is new in our world....

Well we are excited for friends who are currently in Ethiopia having just met their son who they are adopting. They are just waiting for a visa to come so they can bring him home,they have waited over 15 weeks for this thing, they decided to go and be with him until it came(been there a couple weeks so far). So cool!(them going), NOT cool, the paper delay!

We have other friends who are planning to adopt from Kenya, and just waiting for a few more pieces of the puzzle to fall in place before they uproot and head there.

We await our match and expect travel either in mid December or Early January, depending on when the matches come.

Myself, Cara and some friends are working on a whole Sunday devoted to Orphan care. www.orphansunday.org, is the inspiration for it, we are so excited. Going have the elementary kids walk thru a day as an orphan, we will share and challenge our church in areas of adoption, orphan care and foster care. We will have ways for them to interact and help, then have an evening time of watching a videocast about the "cry of the orphan" with Steven Curtis Chapman and Francis Chan. That is Nov 7. We will hopefully have our referral before then :)!

Lately I have been struck by the loss and pain the birthparents must feel in this process, thinking that my girls birth mothers, for example, will spend their life wondering," I wonder what kind of child they are like, how they look, what they like to do, are they thriving? Do they hate me for having to choose to have an adoption plan?..."

It saddens me that my girls will have parts of their past they will never know, because we don't know it, praying that absence of past won't cripple them emotionally or spiritually for their future, feeling so helpless that as their dad, I can't fix it, solve it, protect them from that...I CAN be there for them through it, love them with all I have, and then ask God to give me more, so that my girls will see God is more than enough for them and can help them not be trapped by these losses.

It is such a weird dynamic, adoption is such a gift in so many ways, yet it comes from loss...but the redeeming thing I cling to in this is God, the ultimate Father, His heart beats for the orphan,He cares so much for them, so I try to rest in that because I KNOW God makes beauty come from ashes and redeems past losses and hurt!

We are currently tossing around options for sleeping arrangements for Julia. We want to try cosleeping with her(meaning she sleeps in the room with us, in her bed/crib attached to ours) so she knows we are there for her. After months of being in a crib all alone, with no one to hear her cries, to comfort her,we need to teach her the world, no HER world, is not ever going to be like that again, that her needs will be cared for, that she is loved, and will be nurtured, loved, and cared for and that she has parents who will do that for her. I bought a used crib that we may try modifying to make it smaller(it would be an adventure as my carpenter skills are not great, but who knows it may surprise all of us), so it will fit in our room, or we found out there are mini cribs we may purchase that we can then attach to our bed, to make it secure and work with that. Be making that decision this week.

Last week we sat down and worked through a packing list from the research I have done over the years, a bit overwhelming to try to pack with so many unknowns, such as what size will Julia be(who knows!), what will we be able to purchase there(depends on where we end up going!)...fun!!!

Early November we are going on a Banff retreat for pastors and spouses(with Katie), as we don't want to leave her as she will be left with family during the China trip. Mid November I do some Magic for a Youth Conference in Edmonton, still working on some new magic for that. Birthday shows have been good to me, and I am loving having this creative outlet!

Enjoyed having my mom up for Thanksgiving and hoping my dad can make a trip up sometime in November also.

Love being in a church where we have found some people with a similar heart for adoption and orphans, and that as a bonus they are great friends for Cara and I.

Hopefully you folks reading the blog will see some more posts this month as we know WE ARE NEXT(love saying that after so many years of..."it is getting closer..."!!!)

Things to pray for

Pray for:

God to provide for Julia's mental, physical and emotional needs, also by providing people to touch her lovingly, say sweet words to her, notice her...We would be thru the roof if she was in foster care...

Pray that she has the ability to attach, so that even though there will be loss with her leaving an attachment in China, transferring is easier and healthier than having to create it.

Pray she will be able to grieve her losses, as that is HARD but part of healthy attachment.

Pray for our family who have to adjust during the attachment process(meaning as much as we would like to let them and they would like to, take care of Julia-that they will feel grace from God and that we will all have wisdom to know how to best use the love and desire of our family in ways that will help Julia and also allow our family to enjoy her and celebrate her coming into our family).

Pray for the person matching us this month that God will move their arms and eyes to match us to the one HE has for us.

Wisdom for us as we try to figure out packing(what to take, what not to take, working out luggage issues).

We would love for travel before 2011 is done, so that would mean getting a match end of October or EARLY November.

Wisdom in how to deal with allergy issues in China(food) I can't eat nuts, Cara can't eat seafood/fish...

That we will be easily accessible when the match happens.

That the doctor we give the medical info we get in the match will be given wisdom from God to analyze it truly.

That the paperwork that comes with a match will be processed well and completely, so there are no delays.

That once we are matched that TA(Travel Arrangements- visas etc, gets processed QUICKLY(it can take a month to 7ish weeks) the sooner we get approval the sooner we can book flights.

That travel will come at a time when travel costs are not too high.

So there are a few thing to pray about :)!

re-researching

Spent some time over the weekend looking over old emails from yahoogroups etc that I had saved from 2005 on, compiled some lists(packing, etc), still have to make some decisions on what we want as our final list for packing.

It was great to be doing this, this time, knowing the time is drawing near, and then once we get our referral, researching orphanage and province info.

I am suspecting we will get our referral when we are out of town, it would just figure...

Looked at blogs of folks just matched, it was great to feel that knot in the stomach again, of anticipation, and excitement,little bit of apprehension...