Thoughts on our US adoption

First off, I want to be VERY clear, I will be delighted with whatever gender of child we get from the US.

Since I was like 16 or 17 I always desired to be a parent and a dad, but it was always a dad of a daughter, I never really gave thought to being the dad of a little boy, but the last few months that is where my head has been. I still entertain thoughts of a little black girl curling up on my lap, looking into my eyes and saying "daddy", but I have started entertaining thoughts of a little boy, and that has been fun. The toys I can buy for myself...err for him ;)...no seriously, the thought of having a boy around, someone to eventually be able to buddy around with, have to help with doing things in the house and yard together, being able to model(or at least trying) to model how to be a godly man for him to learn from, seeing him grow strong, having someone to wrestle around with, laugh when he does typical boy stuff that will make his mom's eyes roll and freak her out are thoughts that are keeping my mind occupied(when I am not neck deep in camp stuff-still one week to go)!

One of the roller coaster things about this journey is that there is no guarantee we will get matched, now we obviously think we will, but it is one of those x factors that make planning life so hard...with Julia, we will have time to plan travel, plan to get ready, make transitions in home and job etc. whereas for little bean it will be a wait followed by an intense volley of info and talking, a decision and bang, flying into a new adventure...

Ahh the joys of adoption journey...life has been so full with camp ministry...that there isn't a lot of brain space for adoption stuff, which isn't so bad since it makes the wait go faster :)